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Confronting fear and limiting beliefs

Imagine this..

Go on this brief thought journey with me. You just were let go from your job. Subsequently, you try to understand how and why this has happened to you. With limited information, you start to fill in the gaps with the following ideas: “I was not a great employee, so of course they let me go.” “I could have worked harder.” “I did not deserve to have this position.” “I wont ever find another role like that.” “I am not good enough to find another position”. *end thought journey*

this is part of my truth

Those exact thoughts went through my mind a few months ago. Without fully grasping the facts surrounding the shift in my role and employment, I created my own. Importantly, the thoughts were not based on feedback from a supervisor or co-worker. They were entirely my own and they were harmful to my esteem and damaging to my self-worth. As I write this, I have moved though these feelings and am upset that I allowed those thoughts to be primary. In short, I have more unlearning to do.

Fear in the body

The next time you catch yourself immersed in a limiting beliefs thought loop, see if you can tap in to your body and identify where in your body you are feeling the emotion. Is it a tightness in your chest? an awareness of your heartbeat? a dry mouth? a sudden headache? do you want to curl up into child’s pose? It may be some of those sensations or something entirely different, but tuning in and confronting the feeling is an important step. In addition, it also encourages greater physical body awareness.

As you explore the sensation, think about ways that you can honor the feeling and also return to a state of equilibrium. Find a comfortable seated position, take deep breaths, place your hands over your heart and your stomach, close your eyes and allow yourself to be in the moment. That sequence of events helps me get back to a grounded space. Feel free to give it a try!

If you can identify with this thought pattern, you may, like me, default in certain situations to limiting beliefs. You may be continually getting in your own way with negative self-talk. Thankfully, there are ways to work through this; ways to allow your love for yourself to overshadow the fear. On my youtube channel, I discuss a different example of my own limiting beliefs and part of the process for moving through the feelings. Below, is a challenge or exercise for you to do to help clear those thoughts. To use nature imagery, a way to clear the shadows or clouds of fear that are obstructing the affirming light in your life.

Clearing limiting thoughts exercise

  1. Identify a desired outcome that brings up fear, doubt, or limiting beliefs
    • Fill in the blank: I want to clear limiting beliefs and doubts around ——-.
  2. Identify two or more limiting beliefs
  3. Thank the limiting beliefs for what they teach you or how they protect you
  4. Forgive yourself for carrying the thought
  5. Give yourself permission to honor the thoughts and move past them

Want to learn more about limiting beliefs? Dr. Tomi Bryan has a great worksheet on her site that follows these steps and also goes more in-depth about what limiting beliefs are.

I’m glad my words were able to reach you. all my love

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Reflect. Plant seeds. Rest.

Lessons learned

2020 has been an incredible teacher, if you were in the space to hear and receive the lessons. For me, some of the greatest lessons and take-aways have been:

  • Stepping into my spiritual gifts
  • Become a student grounded in the art of boundary setting
  • Connecting with my ancestors
  • Opening myself to relationships with incredible teachers
  • Allowing spirit and faith to guide my steps
  • The power of exploring and fostering my inner sanctum
  • Shifting my perspective on loss

This is not an exhaustive list. It currently feels critically important to acknowledge the seeds that this year has planted. The seeds that I will continue to foster with intention and allow to bloom in their own time.

May we learn from winter

Winter is a season of rest and hibernation. A season of internal preparations. As the leaves fall from the trees, leaving barren limbs – the tree is focusing on replenishing it’s energy. Simultaneously, as it dropped its leaves, it has spread it’s seeds- Seeds of new life and ideas.

May we learn from this awesome and powerful season – which, in the case of 2020, has metaphorically been carrying on through the year.

Call to action

To prepare for the challenge and call to action below, I invite you to get grounded. Some of the ways I ground are through yoga asana flows, meditation with my plants and music. A current favorite song is Grounded by Ari Lennox

Take a few moments and some deep breaths as you explore these questions:

  • What do I desire?
  • What do I want to create for myself?
  • How can I foster my imagination?
  • What does it mean to live with intention?
  • What “seeds” can I plant now – knowing that they will grow later?

Invite your answers to guide you and then allow yourself to rest knowing that the ideas -as seeds- have been planted.

I’m glad my words were able to reach you. Hello solstice.

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Learning to love the power of stillness

Mia sitting in stillness with hands in prayer

The space between breaths

I am generally an advocate for movement in all forms; physically, emotionally, financially, spiritually, etc, but the need for restoration, the power of stillness and reflection are equally important. Imagine the space between your breaths. That is a place of stillness and endless potential; a discerning point between the in and out breath. This pause is a neglected yet significant part of the breath.

Mind and body

I have been struggling to find mental stillness for the past couple of days and today a conversation with a dear family member brought things into perspective. As my mind moves a million miles a minute, I can be still and breathe. I am able to find stillness with my body and allow it to transfer within. Returning to the present with love in my heart, for that’s all that is.

The present is a gift

For the sake of transparency, I have been spending less and less time in my stillness. My intentional meditation practice has dwindled and I am beginning to feel it. Constantly on the move, going to the next idea, thought, or task. Running from myself figuratively and literally. This post serves as a reminder to myself and you, the reader, that being present is a gift.

Unlearning busyness

In this life, we are constantly stimulated and distracted. Finding stillness does not need to be boring. This is something to unlearn. Tapping into the power of your stillness and being present has the potential to hold the answer to any matter of the mind or heart. Being still, we can actually hear and be with ourselves. Can we learn to be still and breathe? Give it a try with this song, a personal favorite, and jot down anything that comes to mind.

How I the power of stillness

  • listen to guided mediations
  • play music without lyrics
  • sit in nature
  • walk on grass barefoot
  • look at the palms of my hands
  • focus on a stagnant object

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Rollercoaster of emotions

Sitting with and fully allowing myself to feel emotions like anger, frustration and sadness is something I am learning to appreciate. I find it relatively easy to revel in my moments of joy but when a challenging emotions arises , I analyze it and rarely feel it. I may be missing an opportunity to learn from these difficult emotions, which are simply part of the roller coaster of life.

August’s ups and downs

August, in particular, was a beautiful challenge. I launched a new segment of my business, the MyInnerAura Art Shop, another one of my god children was born, a woman who raised me and was one of my greatest teachers in life passed away suddenly, and it is the anniversary of the loss of a friend who taught me to live my life on purpose.

We ebb and flow

I jokingly told my sisters that I didn’t like the beginning of August and they quickly reminded me that the good comes along with the tough moments. They are interconnected. This idea of the difficult and beautiful moments happening in tandem has been a core point while working with my therapist and to unpack some heavy repressed memories from my past.

Saying hello to my shadow

My desire to tap in to my past is in part because I want to learn about the way that my past impacts my present. Secondly, I know that there are beautiful joyful moments that have been repressed along with the painful ones. Taking a step into my shadow is hard work and I feel that I am on a rollercoaster of emotions.

Learning from nature

In one moment I am proud of myself for taking the deep dive, inspecting the areas of my life that are not all “puppies and unicorns”. A moment later, I am holding back tears of frustration and sadness. Like a tree branch, the process of emotions is not a straight line. There are bends and twist all the way from the trunk to the edge of the branch.

Note to self: you can do it

To support myself as I move through this work, I talk with my close friends and I have started to go on daily runs. That may seem sadistic to some but my runs are a reminder that I can push through the challenging moments and feel incredible (or not so great) on the other end; simply a reminder that I can and will get to the other side. The ebb and flow of emotions during my runs, echo my feelings when journaling and during a therapy session.

Sources of support

  • What support systems do you have in place or would you like to have in place?
  • Who/What is a part of that support system?
  • Are they contributing to your greatest good? I hope so. If they aren’t, you are in charge and can make a change whenever you want. Cheers to doing the hard work!
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Trust the process: turn off the GPS

a road in O’ahu Hawai’i surrounded by greenery and mountains

How often are you present to your journey- this gift that is life? A few nights ago, I was on my way home from a dance class and I turned the GPS on in my phone without thinking. The path I was taking home was not unfamiliar to me yet, the need to have a defined path set for me and directions spoken out loud was important.

The goal is set, now what ?

Halfway through my ride, I thought “why do I need the GPS? I know where I’m trying to going. I’m turning this off.” GPS is great because it helps us get from point A to point B in the shortest amount of time and helps us navigate around traffic and detours. Perhaps those detours, scenic routes and traffic are missed moments of joy.

To be transparent, I used to hate traffic and did everything in my power to maneuver around it. Whether that was taking a different train line to get to work faster or taking local roads or another parkway to avoid sitting in bumper to bumper traffic. But what’s the harm is getting “lost” and taking a few extra moments on your journey?

Shifting perspective

As of late, I’m taking notes from traffic and detours; allowing them to be my teachers – reminding me to slow down and appreciate the present. Consider this for a moment, how often do you set a goal, do the work, and then accomplish said goal? How does it feel when you accomplish the goal? For me, sometimes I am elated, other times I’m dissatisfied or I’ll feel something else in the range of emotions.

I have this goal checked off on my list (yes, I like lists), now what? What’s next? Do I have another goal in mind? This thought pattern – without a pause to appreciate the accomplishment or the journey – is one that I am unlearning.

The process

A crucial part of achieving goals is the work it takes to get to your result. For me, it’s the grunt work, the “put your right foot in front of your left”, the journey, the crippling doubt, the transformation, the sweat, the joy, the tears. Learning to enjoy and be present during each stage of the journey has made accomplishing goals an even more enjoyable experience.

The featured image for this post is a road in O’ahu Hawai’i that I experienced last year. We were on our way to one of the most beautiful beaches I’ve ever experienced (in this case, the goal). If I’d just been paying attention to point B, I would have missed out on the awe inspiring mountains and nature that I was surrounded by during the journey.

An invitation

Being goal oriented is dope, at times. May you see the beauty and trust yourself throughout the journey. There are blessings, teachers and gifts hidden in life’s traffic, detours, and scenic routes. I invite you to turn off the GPS every once in a while.

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Energy Awareness: what’s going on with your “cup”?

two friends embracing and smiling

On this journey of reconnecting with myself and my gifts, I’ve become keenly aware of ways that I share my energy; specifically, the times that I am pouring from my cup into others. Who I do it for? What times of the month I am more inclined to give of myself freely? How I share myself?

Filling my cup

I am proud of myself for this increased energy awareness and encourage you to pay attention too. I have learned that creating art, writing, dancing, reading, singing, self-play, meditation, moving and practicing/teaching yoga help me refuel. While this is a nice list of things that I enjoy, they are almost exclusively solo activities.

Don’t get me wrong, solo activities are crucial. It is important to be able to enjoy your time with yourself. I’ve become skilled in the art of masturdating. As an semi-extroverted introvert, I know that I need me time to be my best. But there is more to the story.

Pouring from an empty cup is draining. So is not allowing yourself to be poured into by others.

If you’re anything like me (regularly doing for and helping others) when do you allow yourself to be catered to, listened to or taken care of ? Who do you let in to care for you ? How does it feel to be poured into? Who do you hold space with – not just hold space for?

Story time

I recently connected with some good friends for brunch at their home. I hadn’t seen them in a long time due to the pandemic but after months of virtual games and lots of FaceTime catch ups, we were finally enjoying a meal together.

I brought drinks and fruits to contribute to the brunch. However, each time I tried to help with the preparation of the meal they told me they are taking care of it and by extension me.

Who do you hold space with – not just hold space for?

Share the give and take

This is a simple example but having friends who are intentional about caring for me and listening to me remind me that there can be balance in relationships; a shared give and take.

Relationships like this friendship remind me that I deserve to be loved, cared for and taken care of the way that I care for others. That my cup deserves to be poured into. Do you know what’s going on with your cup?

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Reflecting on rain

tree pose in the rain

This morning, I went to the track to run for the first time in months. As I pushed myself to complete a mile, I was transported back to my track and soccer days . The sky darkened and became more overcast, but I wasn’t pressed. I was transiting from jogging to sprinting and other people were still running and working out on the field, even as it began to rain lightly.

A few minutes later, as I finished my last sprinting lap, the sky opened up. Now, it was me and one other person who was kicking a soccer ball around on the opposite end of the field. As I laid on the track to catch my breath, I felt every rain drop making contact with my face. I felt calm, comfortable and cleansed. My plan was to do to yoga on the field after running, so that’s what I did. Practicing handstands, headstands, tree pose, dancing in the rain, and doing cartwheels, I simply took in and became one with the rain. I felt so light, free and full of joy. The gratitude I felt for the earth and water elements surrounding me, was deep and breathtaking.

As I wrapped up my short practice and prepared to head back home; I began to think about what rain means for me. When people think of a rebirth, many will imagine a Phoenix rising from the ashes. While that imagery is part of my thinking, I generally consider rain and its cathartic, cleansing power. For me, rain brings up space for new life, it fosters an environment for ideas to grow and flourish physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, metaphorically, and beyond.

Self Inquiry

What do you do when the rain comes?

What does the rain mean for you?

What do you learn from the rain?

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Self: Part One – Doubt and Procrastination

Since mid-adolescence, I have been a self-identified and labeled procrastinator. 

“I work better under pressure.” 

“I do my best work the night before.” 

“I’ll do it tomorrow. I’ve got plenty of time.” 

These are some of the statements I would tell myself and others to rationalize my procrastination. Have you used these lines as well?

Sidebar: I distinctly remember someone telling me that I’m too good at rationalizing bad behavior and decisions. I disagreed at the time, but I am starting to see his point. 

I am certainly no stranger to getting work done early or starting a project well in advance. Better yet, I’ve successfully followed my backward planning schedule to meet my goal. However, there are an equal number of, if not more, cases where I procrastinate on a project and then complete it under a stress-inducing timeline. 

My memories of procrastination

High school

Throughout my life, procrastination has manifested in numerous ways. Lately, I’ve been taking some time to reflect on each of these manifestations. In high school, I remember staying up late to write a history paper that was due the following day. I spent half of the night crying out of frustration and the other half with my parent sitting next to me as I wrote and talked out my essay. For the rest of my time in high school, I remembered that terrible night and asked myself why I waited to do my work so late in one of my most challenging classes. I did not have an answer but I did start going to extra help with my teacher for feedback on papers well in advance. 

College

During my junior year, I was unable to get my work done for a good portion of a semester. This was not entirely procrastination. The extraneous things happening in my life led to a lot of stress and anxiety. However, as I look back on that difficult time, I remember intentionally doing busy work for my organizations and extra-curricular activities before addressing my school work. By the time I was ready to sit down and do my work, I was conveniently exhausted and would think “I’ll do it tomorrow.” I followed this cycle and spiraled into a state of complete disarray by the end of the term. Thankfully, I was able to complete the semester and continue my undergraduate career. Shoutout to my dean, advisors, and counselor. Since then, I thought I had shaken the procrastination bug, but I was wrong. 

Present-day

As of late, my procrastination has manifested as distracting myself and doing easy projects rather than challenging projects and tasks that require deep thought and intentionality. For example, at work, I will be aware of a project that is important for my future and rather than working on my project, I will spend hours entering data that is not time-sensitive at all. A personal project that I’m working on is putting together a research proposal and it’s been an arduous process. This is something that I started last year and gave up on because I did not plan properly nor did I believe in myself. Reinvigorated, I picked up the project a few months ago and I felt like I was on a roll. My passion was fueling me and things were falling into place until they weren’t. 

The pattern re-emerged. In the time I had scheduled and mentally dedicated to my research proposal, I would distract myself with social media, visit friends and family, do chores, play with my dog or anything else that was not my proposal, followed by “I’ve got plenty of time.” The proposal is due in a few weeks. 

Digging deeper

As I reflected on this disturbing pattern of procrastination, I dug deeper. I spent time pondering during therapy sessions, meditations, and any downtime and eventually had an aha moment. I was uncomfortable at my discovery that I am not as confident as I believe. Under this pattern of distraction and putting off work, is a mound of self-doubt that sounds something like “If you don’t really try, then you did not fail” and “someone else’s work will be better, so why bother?” This is what I’ve identified, with years of practice retraining my thoughts, as self-incriminating negative self talk or psyching myself out. Thankfully, this doubt comes in waves and I am not constantly tearing myself down. I know what this looks and feels like because I also used to do that incessantly. stay tuned for a future post for more details 🙂

self-preservation

The self-doubt serves a dual purpose as a protective measure. By protecting myself from failure or rejection, by not trying or giving my all, I immediately have an explanation for a less than favorable outcome. I realize that I am potentially preventing myself from gaining amazing opportunities and experiences, but at times it is easier to prematurely cut my losses, instead of being disappointed later. 

This is a mindset that lays low and strikes when I’m at my most vulnerable point, which will sometimes lead to a downward spiral of negative self-talk and heightened self-doubt. I have moments when I feel on top of the world and very capable and competent but the moment a new challenge presents itself, my default is to highlight why I am not qualified or capable rather than highlighting my ability to try or learn. It’s a strange feeling to put into words. 

As I work through whatever task is in front of me, there are ways that I shake my doubt for long enough to get some work done. However, I largely remain in this negative space about myself until I complete the project and then leave behind the difficulty that I experienced. 

Revisiting my proposal 

I’ve spent months talking about this proposal with family and friends. Many of them are speaking a successful acceptance into existence and I was on board until I tried to put my ideas and thoughts down on paper. The same debilitating self-doubt creeps in every time I sit to write out the next phase of my project. Then, I spiral and spend more time deconstructing and bashing my project than building it up. Eventually, I will shake my doubt with some meditation, music, exercise or a conversation and get some work done. A few days later, I find myself in the same low point and repeat this cycle of combating doubt. 

Combatting self-doubt

Music

One tactic that I use to combat my self-doubt is music. I actually have a “real motivation” playlist that I created during my post-graduation funk that proves helpful to this day. A lot of the lyrics are focused on success, owning my awesomeness, and feeling good. They are not a cure-all but they do help reduce the frequency of negative self-talk about my abilities and potential. 

Support system

Another good tactic, if you are lucky enough to have one and realize it, is leaning on your support team and talking through your fears and doubts. If your friends are anything like mine, they will remind you of your capabilities and provide some insight and tips for when they struggle with doubt. I am truly blessed and I hope you realize that you are too! 

Movement

Lastly, I get some endorphins flowing when I’m in a funk. I imagine that anyone who has read any of my other posts is not surprised by a mention of physical movement. I’ll take a break and go for a walk, bike ride, or do some yoga for a pick me up. The effects aren’t always long-lasting but they certainly do help. 

This is something that I am currently working through and will likely struggle with in the future. The bright side is that now I am more self-aware of the ways that I get in my own way and the reasons that I do it. I know that I won’t wake up tomorrow without an ounce of self-doubt. However, I am better equipped today than I was a few years and even months ago. 

Have any of you experienced something similar? Have you taken time to look at the relationship between procrastination and self-doubt in your life? Are they connected for you? Do they manifest together or are they unrelated? Did this post illuminate anything for you? Feel free to share your experience in the comments or directly with me! 

Take a look at this weeks challenge deconstructing self-doubt to dig deeper!

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Keep moving

Keep moving forward.

After learning and slaying some choreography, our dance instructor asked the class what makes us happy. To my relief, she had someone on the other side of the circle answer first. I unexpectedly had a blank mind when I first heard the question and mild panic set in. Slowly ideas popped up and my thought process was as follows: there are so many things that I feel happy doing. Why can’t I think of an answer to this question? What am I happiest doing right now? What keeps me up at night and gets me up early in the morning? Once I posed these questions to myself, while listening to the other dancers, I knew my answer. Movement is what makes me happy. Movement in every possible way but my favorite types of movement are emotional, physical, mental and social.

Sometimes movement is hard

The statement “movement makes me happy” is simplistic and does not paint the full picture of my experience. The end result of engagement with various movements is generally happiness, but working through the motions and in some cases just getting started is the hard part. The past few weeks are a perfect example of the difficult feelings that go into movement for me. I’ve been feeling stuck in more ways than one and have been stagnant emotionally, mentally and physically. Because I know what it feels like to move and release emotionally, mentally and physically, I crave it. This makes feeling like I can’t move unbearable.

As I go through my day, I feel and see everything moving and growing around me but I am not moving. Rather, I feel like I am going through the motions and life has a hold over me. It is a strange sensation for me since I usually absorb energy from my environment and find it encouraging.

Movement through time

This post was written over the course of three weeks because each time I returned to writing, I felt stuck. I talked about how I was feeling with friends and my counselor but nothing would budge.

Mentally, my mind was filled with so many thoughts that I was not able to sort or move through. Each thought was taking up a large amount of mental space and seemed to big to handle. This led to me feeling anxious and stressed every day which bled into other aspects of my life. Emotionally, I was out of tune and could only identify feeling overwhelmed and tired. Physically, I was not practicing my night routines and getting poor quality sleep. I would wake up late and skip over potential morning yoga. I was not being mindful about planning meals, I ate emotionally, and I ate a lot of foods that added to me feeling awful. Socially, I bailed on plans with friends, spent time with family and friends sparingly and retreated into myself.

While feeling stuck and low is not a new experience for me, it does not make the experience any easier. I desperately wanted to feel better and to flow emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually again.

Getting re-aquatinted with movement

Mental

After allowing myself to sit in my feelings, I slowly found small ways to create movement during my day. I reintroduced meditation during my commute. Each time I tried doing a guided meditation, I would lose my focus and couldn’t still my mind. I took another approach and listened to music and chants instead. For those 8 to 40 minutes, my mind let go and would flow with the music. Each session was short lived, but it was enough for me to get a taste of joy through mental movement.

Emotional

A conversation with my sister was the catalyst for emotional movement. I explained how I felt overwhelmed and tired and she reminded me to practice gratitude in those moments. By taking time to focus on and give attention to the fact that have a family that loves me, an adorable dog that lights up my life, a job that I enjoy that challenges me, and friends and a therapist who help me grow, my volatile emotions and thoughts began to calm. I took practicing gratitude a step further and was intentionally mindful about my basic needs being met, feeling the earth beneath my feet, and listening to the sounds around me. Gratitude and mindfulness grounded me and created a path for me to attune to my emotions.  

Physical

With poor sleep hygiene in full effect, I felt lethargic and was running on fumes. Reintroducing physical movement started by taking the stairs rather than the escalator during my commute to get my blood flowing. At work, I increased my number of walks to the water cooler during the day and through the park during my lunch break. The increased blood flow didn’t always result in happiness, but it felt good. Next, I started to plan my meals again and only eat foods that I actually wanted when I felt hungry. Lastly, I found new ways and times to move physically. I tried yoga and night and starting my commute with a walk instead of driving.

Social

Having a better sense of how and what I felt made it easier to engage with family and friends. When opportunities presented themselves, I said yes and actually showed up. I eventually started to initiate plans to see and do activities with friends and showed up as my authentic self. I didn’t sugar coat or hide the difficult feelings that I felt and shared how I was working through them, when appropriate. I spent time with my goddaughter and other small kids who just have a way of making everything better.

Movement continues

As I come to the close of this post, I want to be transparent. They way I wrote about movement and the stagnation is very organized and forward moving. It is not an entirely accurate representation of my lived experience but I did my best. Moving through mental space is hard work, moving emotional and physical can be exhausting, and social movement can be draining. It is not always straightforward or following an upward trend. In all truth, it is messy.

Something that I say to friends all the time and occasionally forget is that “growth is not linear or directional. As long as you are not in the same space emotionally, socially, physically or mentally as yesterday, that is a win.” Be gentle with yourself. Allow yourself to move in any direction, not just forward.

Call to action

If you’ve been experiencing stagnation in your life and want to start moving again, take a look at this week’s challenge “movement and stagnation“

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Show Up for Yourself: PED

All of us have brilliant ideas; however, many of these ideas will stay in our idea incubator unless we put them into action. One thing that I’ve always struggled with is showing up for myself and showing up for my ideas. The old pattern looked a bit like this: 1) I have new ideas. 2) I write them down, sometimes even share them with friends. 3) I don’t do anything about or with the aforementioned idea. Aspirations, ideas, and thoughts would sit on a shelf in my mind, untouched. In some cases, they were forgotten until something stirred it up. A perfect example is this blog platform. A few years ago, I told some friends, “I think I want to start a vlog to keep track of and share my thoughts, ideas and focus on growth.” This statement stayed an idea, was forgotten and was stirred up in a new form. Less than a month ago when I told my friend, “I think I’m going to start a blog to catalog this journey of personal growth”, she reminded me of the vlog idea that I thought was long forgotten.

How I showed up for myself

The main difference between the vlog idea and this blog was that I showed up for my idea. I took it seriously and began to plan. I wrote things down, I told my accountability partners, I did some research and I got to work. Every time I thought about giving up on my idea, I reminded myself that no one else can take my ideas for a walk and put them into words except me. If I didn’t create and take up this space, someone else would create their own space, but it would never be the same as mine. With that spark and some other reminders, I owned that I had to be the person to plan, execute and do it again and here you are reading my next post.

Let’s get real

I realize that the way I described the development of this platform may sound simple and that is the farthest thing from the truth. When planning, it is easy to get wrapped up in logistics of the ideas that you have. You can plan mentally, get flustered by the mental plan and then become overwhelmed or turned off by my own idea. To be honest, I definitely got wrapped up in logistics like the website layout and almost didn’t launch my blog. I wanted to present the most complete version of my idea and something didn’t feel right. That was really my underlying perfectionism, that I often try to deny, rearing its head. Thankfully, at this point in my journey, I was able to push past this perfectionism, take the next step and get the ball rolling again.

Explaining PED

I have adopted a new pattern that I call PED: 1) plan, 2) execute, 3) do it again. The Latin and Greek root, ped, means foot. This works well with this PED pattern because it’s a reminder to take the first step and then another one. Once you put in the work to make your thought tangible, it’s time to execute. After execution, reflect on the work that you just did, take some notes, think about what you’d do differently next time and then plan your next step (do it again). I believe that it is incredibly important to be flexible with this process. Starting with a plan does not lock you in and prevent the integration of improvements or changes.

Sometimes naturally and at other times with great effort, this plan or method can be applied in all areas of life. In school you have assignments, at work you have tasks, at home you have chores and in life you have aspirations that you can create a plan for, execute and do again. Let’s apply the same structure, PED, and take the first step in turning a concept into reality. Whether it is a new business idea, a class that you want to take or teach, a creative venture, a country that you want to visit, a program that you want to apply for, a book you want to write, a person that you want to connect with, a new goal that you’re working towards or anything else that you can fathom, show up for yourself and your idea by practicing a living PED. I know it feels great for me to do it.

Living PED

Along with this blog, some other ways that I live and practice PED include singing and dancing again, joining a book club, starting with a new therapist, learning a new language, working on program application for next professional steps, connecting with people and growing my network, and picking up new projects at work that challenge and excite me. All of these now executed plans are important to me for different reasons and serve different purposes while fostering physical, intellectual, emotional, mental and professional growth. Hopefully, you will take some time to practice PED and show up for yourself and your ideas. Take a look at this week’s challenge “take your ideas for a walk” for some instruction.  

A word of caution

To readers, like me, who like to put a lot on their plate: while living and practicing PED is better than leaving your ideas idle, every thought does not need to be acted on at the same time. That can easily lead to burn out, frustration, and mental, emotional, financial or physical strain. Take a few moments to do some pre-planning and practice discernment and prioritization. PED can begin once this important step is done.